Thursday, October 18, 2012

Every Title Has a Story That Follows...



Wow!  I can’t believe I’m doing this!  I have been a reader of blogs for years now.  I’ve observed how people have shared their stories with others through this form of communication.  I have been blessed by thoughts and ideas shared by others.  Now I’m ready to share my story and bless others!  That’s the way I work.   I observe until I’m comfortable, and then I jump in! 
            Before I do anything else, I want to explain the title of my blog.  Last year at exam time, my Mom sent me a care package of brownies because obviously, chocolate makes everything better!  Right after picking up the package, I headed to lunch where I offered them to all my friends sitting at the table with me.  I couldn’t resist sharing the joy of a care package and homemade goodies!  When I got back to my suite, I set the container of brownies on the table in our common area which was the sign between my suite mates, roommate, and I that the food was fair game for anyone.  Even though I love chocolates and sweets, I try to limit myself to one sweet per day.  Because of a busy schedule, I was never in my room at the time when the sweet tooth craving hit and a number of days passed. 
            One day, I noticed that my brownies were about gone, and I planned to eat the last few that evening.  It must have been a weekend because when evening came, my suite mates, roommate, and I were all in the room at the same time which was a rare occurrence, especially at exam time!  Before I got the chance, my suite mates grabbed the container of brownies, and before I knew it, I was eating half of a brownie instead of the two or three I had planned to eat.  As I sat there sulking over my missed treat, it also dawned on me that out of the whole container of brownies I had only eaten two and a half.  I was really disappointed because care packages had not been a frequent occurrence throughout the school year because of events in my family that I’m sure I’ll tell you more about later.  I had been really excited to eat those brownies and was kind of mad that my suite mates had eaten all of them. 
            I pouted for a couple of days, but as I thought about it, I realized how silly I was being.  I had willingly offered the brownies to my friends at lunch the day they had come, and I willingly set them on the table in the common area knowing I was telling my suite mates it was okay to eat them.  I had made an offering of ALL my brownies to my friends, but I hadn’t actually meant for them to eat them all.  As I thought more and more about it, I realized that this was one big metaphor for my life.  Over and over again, I offer my life to God and say I’m ready to do whatever you want me to do.  And over and over again when God asks me to do something, I quickly take back my offering and tell Him what I actually meant was He could only have a part of my life.  Even after ten years of being a Christian, I struggle with wanting to be in control of my life.  I quickly forget how badly I mess things up.  I also forget how peaceful life can be when I trust God with ALL of my life.  This blog is meant to remind me of “the brownie incident” and serve as an account of my struggles with giving God full control of my life.  May it bring glory to His holy name!

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